Wednesday, November 3, 2010

A Storm Cloud Over Happy Town

So let's start with a picture shall we?
(this picture is in relation to a Baptist Church in Kansas that protested San Diego Comic Con)






















God Hates? Really? ........ I don't think so. But it amuses me they do. Maybe it should make me sad. Or Mad. But instead, it just makes me want to laugh. I mean, the claim to "know" how and what god thinks or will or won't do ...... That's pretty ballsy really. Cause whether you're right OR wrong, you're kind of trying to take on the role of judge, jury, and executioner which, as far as I remember was reserved for one being only. The Supreme Creator, the Omnipotent One, the general Ruler of the Whole Universe. And I thought the All Powerful One kind of frowned on that. I sure wouldn't want to have to explain it anyway. I mean, is there really be any acceptable response when God asks "SOOOOOO..... Why did you think YOU knew how to judge MY creations better than I did?" -______- I'm thinking not.

That's why I try not to judge people. (except when it's funny, of course) God must be ok with it though cause I think I got rewarded by him the other day. And it was all thanks to Devil's Night, aka Halloween. You see, we didn't buy any candy so we had turned the porch light off. Which, as everyone knows, means don't go to the door and ask for candy. But apparently someone didn't get that Mommy Memo because lo and behold the doorbell rang and there they were. Costumed Sugar Vultures. Bags open and eager for candy. But what sugary goodness to give them? Not my ice cream, for sure. But, aside from some Splenda packets, there was nothing else sweet in the house. Just when we thought we might have to give the kids bags of carrots or something else equally unHalloweenish, I remembered all my granola/protein bars. They're sweet enough to not get our house rolled with toilet paper, right? I mean, they've got a token coating of chocolate. They also look enough like a candy bar to fool a kid into thinking they're suitable unhealthy. But what granola bars did I give them? My Luna Chocolate Peppermint bars. My favorite ones. I was kicking myself for giving them the good ones when some of the less yummy ones would have worked. Sigh.... But, I remembered Trick or Treating, and I always wanted to get good candy when I went. So, it was just instinct to give them the best that I could. Those kids darn well better have appreciated them though because I really wanted those stupid Peppermint bars. And you know what? :D I got them the next day. They went on some sort of Super Sale for 50 cents each. I bought like 15 bars. Woo Hoo! Thank you Karma.

But let me tell you what we were doing before the Trick or Treaters surprised us. My brother and I were watching a TV show about why Zombies are so popular. There are people who study that stuff. I'm not even kidding. For example, did you know that there is such a thing as the Zombie Research Society? Well, I didn't, but there is. And they're for serious. They have recommendations for what to do in the event of a Zombie attack. For starters, you should have a 72 hour survival kit. It should contain some form of portable shelter, a walkie talkie for communicating with the still non undead, and food. In the show, they didn't mention anything about projectile weapons, sharp implements, blunt objects, or chainsaws in your survival kit. Though I think they would be very useful items. (I'd go for the projectile weapon myself, wanting to keep as much distance between me and the Zombies as possible) I think the guy they interviewed had his priorities wrong. I mean, Let's face it, if you need a first aid kit you're already done for anyway. Cause everyone knows if you get any sort of cut or bite or scrape, basically if you bleed AT ALL you're in the Future Zombie's of America club. And as for shelter, come on, is there any pop up tent that's going to keep out zombies? Nope. The walkie talkie? Eh... you're better off just holding out by yourself cause other people are guaranteed to do something stupid that will probably get you killed. Group survival rate in Zombie movies? The odds aren't good. But the food I agree with. You should always have food to eat. Especially when under siege by Zombies.

I've got the perfect food to put in my zombie survival kit too. I saw it at WalMart. It's Spanish and made especially for Halloween. It's called Pan de Muerto. The name literally translates to Bread of the Dead. It's a loaf of sweet bread shaped like a large flower and covered in sugar crystals. It's so nice looking. It's a pretty dead bread. :D It's kind of large for an emergency bag, though. The box it came in was bigger than my head. But it looked yummy, and it would be situation appropriate for a zombie survival kit. Plus, I could chuck the box at any attacking Zombies. Yeah. So, what would you have in your Zombie Survival Kit?